During the spring of my insanity something happened. I had a not yet one year old and a not yet two year old and an event occurred I still can’t quite believe.
I attempted to clean my house.
It was brave I’ll give you that. And fool-hardy. It was the kind of bravery that makes people appear on American Idol when they can’t sing. I picked the dishes. Dishes seemed safe. They seemed like a project that could be declared done unlike the vague “pick up the mess” when the whole house WAS the mess.
I got two pieces done. I remember that like it was yesterday. Two. Pieces. And then I heard liquid dripping behind me. I turned around in slow motion and saw two little cute faces hovering over the drawer of plastics. A juice cup in one of their hands. An empty juice cup. The drawer was not empty, it was now full of juice and juice covered dishes.
While I stood there the juice started to drip through the drawer and down to the floor where it flowed under the fridge and stove. How much juice was in that cup anyway? It was like the bloody parable of the widow whose lamp didn’t go out. And the realization hit me: I traded two pieces of clean dishes for a stinking river of juice and an entire drawer of dirty dishes. I attempted to make things better and I made them worse.
And I knew then that I would be doing this same thing for the rest of my life. (Okay, that’s an exaggeration but at least until toddlerhood was behind us? I don’t know, I haven’t got there yet.) As a stay at home mom my entire world now revolved around things I would have to redo. The dishes would all get dirty. The clothes would all land on the floor. The floor would collect new dust everyday because there was enough dust to fill the world.
Candy Crush is different. It stays done. It has levels and once you complete one you go on to the next one. You don’t keep doing the same thing over and over like your own personal GroundHogDay where you live in an endless loop of cleaning, dishes, diapers, laundry, cleaning, dishes, diapers, laundry.
No, not Candy Crush. Candy Crush knows you. It knows you need a little victory today. It knows you need to feel like you completed something that won’t be undone tomorrow. Or in an hour. That’s why Candy Crush is perfect. No one can mess it up for me. It stays DONE.
Except when my phone crashes in the middle of the final move where I’m going to beat the level I’ve been on for a week.
I fear that my phone is a toddler.