adoption related mushiness

Sailor Baby

My parents had three daughters, then there is an eight year gap, then they had four boys.  My folks are orderly like that.  And somewhere along the way my oldest sister was given a little sailor dress. Navy, white collar, red trim.  And all three of us girls eventually had our pictures taken in that little sailor dress.  We are kind of adorable.  Then came the boys and my mom decided against bucking gender-appropriate-stereotypes and decided to make a boy version instead.  []

i woke up to this

During the long, long wait for this baby to come home I was constantly waking up and remembering.  In the early days it was the sudden remembrance that I had a maybe-baby.  That rush of butterflies and moonbeans and everything is new and the world is awash with possibilities and dreams.   Remembering that there was a beautiful baby on the other side of the world who had my heart.  And would have it for the rest of my life. And this morning?  []