nat’s music

We listened to C___ music again today. Youtube is amazing. Nat listened and watched with rapt attention, loving the beats, the singing, the swaying. It was magical. I want him to always have pride in his heritage. He comes from a country of amazing people, he has their strength and their beauty in every part of him. I love that. {{I kept calling him my seventies baby in this outfit.  So cute.}}

riding in cars with bottles

The doctor. Oh the doctor. Today Nat got (gently) prodded, measured, weighed, and sadly poked by two needles. The first one was quick and he didn’t mind. The second involved vial after vial of blood and more tears than I thought his body contained. It was heartbreaking. On the flip side he also peed on one doctor and loudly talked at/lectured the nurse who took his blood. So there’s that. Also, we are discovering that Nat loves riding in the car. His []

…and other words I won’t be teaching him.

Today was an upsetting day. We went to meet with an adoption lawyer to discuss the adoption finalization* and she was a moron. Seriously. We left in the office and I burst into tears. Tears. OVER A LAWYER. Though "lawyer" is not what I was calling her. Basically she was not familiar with international adoptions ( though she told N on the phone she was) and she was saying we needed all this additional paperwork, including forms from Nat’s birthcountry, new references, []

it’s sinking in still

This still doesn’t seem real. I’ve waited for this moment for so long – waited to meet this child whose face I’ve studied in pictures. And now he’s here and it still seems too good to be true. Even when I had pee dripping down my back, even when my shirt stinks of spit up and my pants have hardened drops of formula. It still doesn’t seem quite real. I’m running out of words that mean "happiness".

a boy and his daddy

I love watching Nate care for Thane.  He’s gentle and kind, and has immense amounts of patience.  I will never forget these early days of parenting together.  Being together in Thane’s room.  The lights off, the nightlight on, the turtle Gigi and Papa gave us beaming stars and a moon on too the ceiling.  Precious. I will never forget the way Thane looks at Nate.  The way Nate looks at Thane.  My two handsome men.  Together at last. We love you Thane.  You’ve []

random stream of memories

Rocking with him, feeling his body relax into my arms. Looking into his eyes while he drinks his bottle. The happiness, it overflows. I’m lost in the realization and wonder of getting to know this human being who I love more than words can say. He seems to relax the most when all three of us are together. It’s like he needs to know that everyone who takes care of him is present. If I see him tensing up we go and []